There is a really interesting and provocative article in the New York Times today about how restaurants treat men differently, and still give men the lead during nice dinners out. Personally, I have very equalitarian views about dining.  I am a full believer in splitting the check, or taking turns paying for meals.  I almost always order for myself.  The only time when I’ll let a guy order my wine for me is if I don’t know how to pronounce the name of what I want (because nothing screams, “I’M NOT 21!” like mispronouncing the evening’s wine selection. hahaha….).

Anyway, Frank Bruni serves up (no pun intended) some interesting discourse on the state of dining room roles.

“Certain musty rites — chivalrous from one perspective, chauvinistic from another — have faded or disappeared. It’s a rare restaurant that gives menus without prices to women dining with men. And most restaurants no longer steer the “ladies” toward the banquette, assuming they want to face out toward the room.

But most restaurateurs concede that women disproportionately end up there, whether by request or reflex…

A table composed entirely of women may receive the most unequal treatment of all, because some servers may see it as a less profitable opportunity.

While the veteran servers I interviewed said that there aren’t significant disparities between the tipping behaviors of men and women, they said that women in many cases are tipping on a lower check total.

Because men can generally put away more food and alcohol, “men spend more, women spend less,” said Steve Dublanica, author of the recent best seller “Waiter Rant.” In addition, he said: “Men eat and leave. Women eat and stick around.” So a server attending to women may have to wait longer “to turn the table over, get another group, get more tips.”

“On a Saturday night,” he continued, “you get these two ladies who walk in and say, ‘We haven’t seen each other in ages, we’re going to talk and talk and talk,’ and they’ll sit for four hours. Women are more verbal than men. That’s a scientific fact. And I’m like, ‘Ladies, I have reservations for these tables. You’ve got to go.’ ”

As a consequence, Mr. Dublanica explained, “Waiters are guilty of treating female diners as second-class citizens.”

Ms. Bodie countered that top-notch servers consider it a challenge to do the best for — and thus coax the most from — any table they’re given, and don’t see any advantage in showering less enthusiasm on a group of women.”

However, I’d like to make little distinction: while I am all for a lingering lunch or brunch (actually, a relaxing post-church brunch is one of my favorite things), I wouldn’t say that women are categorically slower diners.  Wasn’t it the Supergirls who invented the power lunch?  And when I have after-work dinners with my Supergirl friends, when we take a seat at a table, we are generally out of there in an hour flat–there are phone calls to return, e-mails to check, and feet to pumice (or, at least this is what I assume other people do when they get home)!  No time for chit-chat!

I never know how I feel about “news” articles that make sweeping generalizations on gendered topics (always a recipe for trouble!), but this Daily Mail article about a recent study that blondes really do have more fun (and more confidence!) is really intriguing.

As a (fake) blonde, this article struck a chord with me.  I personally dye my hair because I feel a lot more confident and pretty as a blonde (I have nothing against brunettes, but my brown hair looks really bad on me), but it’s not necessarily a good kind of confident or pretty… it’s conforming to constricting standards of beauty!  I definitely feel better about myself as a blonde, but it’s a sense of well-being that comes from sort of sexist societal pressures to be a certain kind of pretty.  (I probably would be happier being brunette if we were less of a sexist, media-saturated society)

What do you make of this study?  In the meantime, I’m off to get my roots done…

So, I just moved into a studio apartment in Manhattan a few weeks ago.  I absolutely love it, although I’m still getting used to it, especially given that I ended up spending basically the entire summer at home in Albany.  Although I’ve lived in New York for the past two years, I’m still getting used to how different everything is from the suburbs.

So, Saturday night, I discovered the most shocking difference between living in Manhattan and living upstate: it is EXTREMELY difficult to have dance parties.

On Saturday, my two best friends from home came to visit me in the city for the day.  We had a really fun time, did a lot of walking, a lot of good eating and drinking, and I got to show off my apartment.  Then, at the end of the day when my friends went back home, I had all of this adrenaline in me but I didn’t really feel like making plans to go out… Hence, the perfect time for a personal dance party!

However, when you have a little studio apartment with neighbors below you, it’s really not polite to be jumping up and down and twirling and doing all that embarrassing dancing that goes with having a private dance party!  So, what’s a city girl to do?  Personally, I tried to jump around and dance a little more delicately, but it definitely took a little bit of the energy out of my dance party.

Anyway, here’s my ultimate private dance party playlist:

“Do You Know,” by Enrique Iglesias

“Ants Marching,” by Dave Matthews Band

“Crash,” by Dave Matthews Band

“Feeling Good,” by Michael Buble

“See You Again” by Miley Cyrus

“Hot and Cold,” by Katy Perry

“You Spin Me Round (Like a Record),” by Jessica Simpson

“Stronger,” by Kanye West

“Umbrella,” by Rihanna

And then finally, my favorite song ever, “the Girl from iPanema”

So, what are your favorite private dance party songs?  And tell me, New Yorkers, how the hell do you have rockin’ private dance parties in your apartments without disturbing your downstairs neighbors?

I had a blast watching last night’s debate with friends over drinks and commenting on the debate.  I personally thought both Palin and Biden did well; both were very passionate, although Palin did slip up a few times (I wonder if it’s a Republican tradition to have a faulty grasp of the pronunciation of the word “nuclear”).  However, did anyone else notice how little Palin’s face moved?  Not to be judgmental, but I wonder if she’s had work done…  Biden also looked totally tawny–I wonder whether it was fake-bake or spray tan…

However, more interesting to me (although definitely less significant than the other issues at had) was the way Bristol Palin, the eldest daughter of Sarah Palin–who is pregnant–was presented as the families of the candidates came on stage to embrace one another after the debate.  Bristol looked really plainly dressed (actually, she wore a rather boxy, unflattering dress), her hair and makeup was pretty simple, and she was in charge of holding her baby brother.  I know this sounds really cynical of me, but when she was walking on stage, I really felt like she resembled the way Hester Prynne was treated in the Scarlet Letter, like the stylist for the campaign was maybe conveying the message that now that Bristol is pregnant, she’s definitely not going to be sexy and she’s definitely not going to be emphasized in the campaign.

Did anyone else get that feeling?

Meanwhile, of all the media commenting on the debate, I most value my younger sister Allie’s take on the debate: “Sarah Palin should ride her polar bear back to Alaska.”

Here, here!

I absolutely love Post Secret, the book series and blog that display illustrated postcards bearing peoples’ deepest, darkest secrets.  This week, there are some particularly good secrets with particularly beautiful postcards… check it out!

(But watch out, Post Secret is SO addictive.  The blog is updated every Sunday, and you’ll find yourself in front of your computer at 9:30am refreshing and wondering, “Why hasn’t Frank updated yet?!)